Issue editor: WBB '08; Cover: JAP '08
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Waiter: (grinding) Sir, just tell me when.
Patron: …
Waiter: Sir, let me know when you want me to stop.
Patron: …
Waiter: Sir? D- Do you want me to stop? Please just say something.
Patron: …
Waiter: Sir? Do you want this much pepper? I’m sorry, I know you’re a patron. I’ll keep going.
Patron: …
Waiter: Sir, with every passing second, more pepper is going onto your food… do you understand that? Do you understand what is happening?
Patron: …
Waiter: Is this…are you even going to eat this? The other customers…they- they’re all looking at you.
Patron: …
Waiter: Jesus Christ sir, what are you? Are you a human? Are you an actual human being? Or are you some kind of freak or something? I- I can’t even see the food anymore.
Patron: …
Waiter: Oh my God sir, this isn’t funny …my arm, it’s…oh my God it’s spasming…
Patron: Okay that’s good.
Waiter: Bon appétit sir.
MKG '10
Lampoon comix by John Updike.
Comedy by Conan O'Brien from his time at Harvard.
More Conan comix.
A B.J. Novak piece from the Lampoon archives.
Comedy by Andy Borowitz from his days on The Lampoon.
Past Daily Comedy pieces.
Past Weekly Comix.
Death Cab for Cutie visited the Lampoon on Sunday May 11th, 2008.
Comedian Lewis Black visited the Lampoon on Friday April, 18th.
San Diego rock trio Grand Ole Party visited the Lampoon on Friday April, 11th.
Singer and songwriter Art Garfunkel visited the Lampoon Castle on March 1, 2008 for a dinner in his honor.
