Three Pieces About Vampires

1. Everyone knows that vampires hate garlic and sunlight. But does anyone know some of the things that vampires really like?

-Walking the streets at night when everyone else is asleep
-Preparing sumptuous garlic dishes they will never eat
-Wicker coffins from a reputable imports dealer
-When someone tries to stab them with a wooden stake and they just catch in in their hands without even opening their eyes
-Writing parodies of popular songs so they are about vampires
-Weak, bleeding children and women
-Other vampires with similar personalities

2. I've heard vampires really like blood.
I bet they don't like it so much when they're about to bite the neck of a virginal young maiden and she suddenly starts bleeding out of her uterus, having just reached puberty that second. How is that even blood if it's like this weird brown?

3. This could also be in the form of a comix. Maybe something like this:)

1. A vampire is sniffing the air in his castle. He smells blood! A thought balloon ("Blood?") lets everyone know what is happening.
2. He creeps up to a closed door. The blood is in there!
3. He throws the door open excitedly!
4. There is a girl putting quarters into a tampon machine and crying. She has just gotten her period for the first time and her own body feels alien to her.

I have a lot more ideas, but they are all pretty similar.

-HHD '08-'09