Cemetery – The Harvard Lampoon

Just Friends #

| Issue Editor: GWN '16 | Art Editor: JXY '16


  GJA '17 , Art: SESH '16



-Hey there, stud. How’d the big date go?


-But the cemetery! We had it all planned out.

-I know. Crunch the leaves, make ghost sounds…

-…wait till she gets spooked, then go in for the kiss!

-It was a disaster. She didn’t cuddle up against me once.

-Did you mess up your ghost voice or something?

-No way. I did it perfectly, just like we practiced.

-And you remembered the line?

-Yeah: “Boo!

-What’s the matter with her? Wasn’t she scared?

-No! She was just really, really sad.

-But the cemetery is so scary. All those spooky gravestones.

-The only gravestone Jenny wanted to go to was her mom’s.

-But that one’s so lame. With the crying angel? What’s scary about that?

-Yeah, we just sat there and talked about her mom.

-Was she like, “I’m so scared, I want my mommy?”

-No, more like, “I am very sad and I want my mother to be alive.”

-Ugh, bummer. That’s the worst, man.

-Now I’m going to have to wait for the anniversary of her dad’s death.