–Ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasure to introduce…it is a pleasure. It – it is a great pleasure to…(laughing) Jim, stop– stop doing that.
[Jim Carrey’s face appears on the Titantron. He is picking his nose and motioning his tongue as if he were giving cunnilingus. He asks the crowd to cheer if they want him to come on stage. They comply.]
–Ladies…ladies and gentlemen. I am…proud to…proud to…Jesus– Jesus Christ, Jim. Stop…(laughing) Stop. Jim…you can’t– Jim. You can’t come on the stage yet.
[Jim Carrey appears on stage with his back facing the crowd, shaking his buttocks from side to side. The crowd begins to chant “Carrey! Carrey!” as he turns his head one hundred eighty degrees to face them. He is wearing designer sunglasses, a dark leather jacket, and Hawaiian underwear. We know this because he has just thrown his pants into the crowd. He begins to moonwalk, backwards, still shaking his buttocks. He is pulling his hair back and forth, causing his head to jerk from side to side. These jerks coincide with his individual moonsteps, making it appear as if he is some sort of puppet master controlling himself with invisible strings. He places his top row of teeth over his bottom lip, so as to appear mentally retarded.]
–(laughing) Jim. Ladies…Jim. Now– Now stop. Jim.