My Prison Photographer – The Harvard Lampoon

Smash and Grab #

| Issue Editor: ZEW '14 | Art Editor: SSR '15

My Prison Photographer

  MDL-G '16 , Art: SAE '17

SAE my prison photographer

Okay Inmate 44, just loosen up. Relax. Can we get this guy an Evian?

Great. Now hold on, Inmate 44, I’m just looking at some preliminary shots. You haven’t found your inner beauty yet, but we’ll find it. We will. We’re really going to make you stand out in the lineup.

 

Yes, that is what you want. You want to stand out in the lineup. Now can I get a different backdrop in here, perhaps a little less institutional,  a little more like… prison in Fiji? I’m sorry, Inmate 44, these conditions are just atrocious.

 

Of course! You’re right. Those handcuffs are messing up my shot. Consider them gone.

 

Yes, yes! Amazing! Now if we could just fix what you’re wearing. Can we get a wardrobe change in here? No? What about a fan to blow back his hair?
It’s fine, Inmate 44! You have an essence, that’s all you need. Okay, you’re a lion now. Give me a roar. The camera is your prey. Roar at your prey, Inmate 44!