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Pieces
QUEER ON THE FRONTIER
8
BWM '19-'21 • October 2020
Host: Hello and welcome back to Queer on the Frontier: the show that examines cultural representati…
Litter
94
SMR '25 •
I was born with so much upward vertical velocity that by the time I plunged back through the roof m…
Bus Driver
70
TAF '19 • May 2018
Uh oh. I did it again. Fell asleep after all the kids got on the bus, so now I gotta get all these …
Dandelion Tales
6
JEC '21 • May 2021
Heineken in one hand and Paradise Lost essay in the other, Dandelion cruised down Lafayette at a co…
Lawnmower
11
MAS '18 • December 2020
Want to stop mowing your lawn like a quivering pussy? Then shut the fuck up and buy the GRASS-FUCKE…
Van Gogh
27
JKF '25 • September 2022
“Let’s start this interview with a simple question. Van, in just a few sentences, how d…
Cancun Trip Review
42
CLC '22-'23 •
I knew spring break in Mexico was going to be fun – but not this fun. Who’d have though…
Life After the Lampoon
18
JFAR '19-'22 • August 2019
Conan O’Brien: Juan, congrats on graduating! Here, take this. Me: Wow, another Ferrari! Con…
Midnight Train
3
AJ '18 • December 2020
Me: Hello, I’m here to catch the midnight train to Georgia. Station Manager: Well, it will b…
President Nice Guy
30
HFJ '18 • December 2020
Richard Holton, our first Nice Guy president, eased out of the womb on December 24, 1921, giving do…
Hell
3
MAG '21-'22 • November 2020
There’s a special place in hell for weird guys who can’t be kept in the regular part of…
Suburban Journaling
48
JKF '25 • December 2023
On summer nights, I would sit by the train tracks. There wasn’t much to do around town except…
The Art of The Password, by Shar
20
PKS '21-'22 • May 2023
If you make your password a real word make it assword because that’ll make your hacker laugh.…
My Ideas for Hallmark Cards
24
MFP '23-24 •
- I’m sorry I spilled your drink - It shouldn’t matter what’s in the cup, whethe…
Vanitas
JLG '21 • October 2020
Dear Judging Committee for the American Society for Magazine Editors, I notice you have not been r…
Paul McCartney Hyping Himself Up Outside of Ricky’s Pub Before Naming The Beatles – July 14, 1958, Liverpool
71
JFAR '19-'22 • August 2019
Okay Paul. You’ve got this mate. You’re gonna go in there, you’re gonna march rig…
Pool Rules
95
SEH '26 • December 2023
Children under the age of 14 may not use the pool without a parent or guardian present, unless th…
Red Dye 40
48
EAT '24 • December 2023
I walk in the door, yoga pants bunched tight around my middle-aged buttocks. My husband thinks I&rs…
Johnny Adventure, Space Cashier
47
JRD '22-'23 •
It’s the future, but not so far in the future that cashiers are obsolete. We open on our prot…
Cruising Altitude
2
MFP '23-24 • September 2021
Good evening passengers, this is your doctor speaking. Yeah, you heard that right. Everybody know…
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