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Pieces
The Time I Got Caught Milking
22
YMC '21-'22 • February 2020
One time I was at the farm, milking some cows when Bobby, the guy that owns the farm, comes out run…
The History of Hats
3
JPW '21 • October 2020
There are all types of hats, like silver or classic. But hats haven’t always dominated our co…
Tales of Vengeance
11
MAG '21-'22 • September 2021
For our upcoming issue, we asked some Lampoon subscribers to write in to share stories about times …
Classical Conditioning
116
MFP '23-24 • January 2022
Alright class, today we’re going to cover something called classical conditioning. Can I get …
Fat Camp
120
JLG '21 • March 2019
My parents said they knew I could lose the weight on my own, but it’d be so much easier for t…
Turing Test
35
FOD '24 • March 2023
— Hey check it out, it’s our lab's newest artificial intelligence. &mdas…
Package Delivery FAQ
27
JGB '25 •
Q: I had issues receiving the correct product. What should I do? A: Name which of the following sc…
Closing Argument
111
SEH '26 • May 2023
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, when I woke up this morning I thought, wow, I am so tired of the …
Draft Dodging
50
RYSL • May 2023
The national draft is underway, and as an amputee I’m terrified of active combat. Thankfully,…
My First Kiss
32
JPW '21 • September 2020
I pick up this girl Julia in my car, and I’m doing 90 on Lincoln Avenue, you know, batting ma…
Kashan Rugs
10
EAH • May 2022
Frogs
70
AMC '23 •
r/women Comix
37
AMC '23 • March 2023
Vanitas
JLG '21 • October 2020
Dear Judging Committee for the American Society for Magazine Editors, I notice you have not been r…
Trading Up
26
EB '24 • September 2022
In 2005, Kyle MacDonald successfully traded up from a paperclip to a house. – Starti…
Kindergarten
3
GPL '21-'22 • October 2020
Hello, is this the mother of Steve Austin? The stone cold professional wrestler? The 54 year old ma…
At a wedding reception
9
SWR '19-'20 • October 2020
Well, here goes nothing… (jumps up on table) Ahem! Mr. and Mrs. Martinez, I can’t le…
Sometimes when I’m thinking…
12
MAG '21-'22 • November 2020
Sometimes when I’m thinking about doing something a little devil will pop up on one of my sho…
Elvis's Draft Letter
87
LKN '25 • March 2023
This message is addressed to Presley, Elvis. Dear Sir: You are hereby notified that you have been…
Heaven
113
CLC '22-'23 • December 2022
– And the last thing is that the Build-A-Bear is closed Sundays, so you’ll want to plan…
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