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Pieces
Elvis Has Left the Building
61
Robert Carlock '95 • November 2020
ANNOUNCER: “Elvis has left the building!” TEENAGE FANS: “(Scream)!” ANNOU…
Chaz's Adventures in Wonderland
37
EAT '24 •
So I was sitting all up in this tree with my Tinder and I saw this white rabbit. And like, that ass…
Goin’ West
DRM '18 • December 2020
Uh oh. I did it again. Fell asleep after all the kids got on the bus, so now I gotta get all these …
Larry Buys Condoms
20
BWM '19-'21 • March 2020
Larry: Hey, can I get some rubbers. Clerk: Yeah, sure, what kind of johnny you looking for, …
The Royal We
JFAR '19-'22 • August 2017
The Royal We was a sitcom about King Arthur and his loyal knight and roommate Sir Elton John Episo…
Medical Report
68
EPS '24 •
I have this disease where everyday at 3 am three dudes kick the shit out of me. It started p…
Donate Broth
49
JGB '25 • May 2022
Crowdsourcing Request
1
TBW '18 • December 2020
Hey Guys!I’m sending you this email to invite you to help with my crowdfunding campaign. I&r…
How McDonalds Came Up With Grimace
1154
JRD '22-'23 • May 2021
Businessman: As I was saying, what do kids love? Characters! We just ran with that. Businesswoman:…
Eugenics
ASB '17 • December 2020
– Looks like your baby came out of the eugenics machine beautifully. – Doctor, that is…
Municipal Archive of Brain Chips in Dalignfort, VA 2077-2122
12
EAT EB •
Folder 4: Security Tapes (Wal-mart) 2099 Man: (spilling 2,000 FlexSeal onto conveyor belt) Sorry, …
Funding Needed for Life-Saving Surgery
251
EB '24 • May 2022
(二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二)$0 raised out of $50000 Please donate to my life-saving surgery. I cannot …
Ice Gun
MFP '23-24 • September 2021
- You know that I love and support you, right? - Of course. - And that goes for anything, includi…
D-Day Picnic
ZDG '20 • June 2020
Soldiers: (storm the beach) (lots of explosions) Father: What the heck we’re having a picnic…
Tales of Vengeance
11
MAG '21-'22 • September 2021
For our upcoming issue, we asked some Lampoon subscribers to write in to share stories about times …
Narcissus Eiffel-Towering
125
NGH '23 AMC '23 •
Bulimia Recovery Clinic
81
YMC '21-'22 • March 2022
My parents decided to send me to the public Bulimia Recovery Clinic over in Toad Suck, Arkansas the…
Vanitas
10
AJ '18 • December 2020
Now that you finally have this issue in your hands, you’re probably wondering one thing and o…
The Dust Bowl
LGF '21-'22 • December 2020
Football is not what it used to be. During my golden years, AKA the Great Depression, we were all i…
Fight Song
6
JFAR '19-'22 • October 2018
This is the fight song for John Wayne Gacy, the Murderer, High School. JWG High We Love You …
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