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Pieces
Titles of Movies I Wrote About Time Travel
10
PKS '21-'22 • April 2021
- I Go Back in Time and Kick Dust All Over the JonBenet Ramsey Crime Scene - I Go B…
QUEER ON THE FRONTIER
8
BWM '19-'21 • October 2020
Host: Hello and welcome back to Queer on the Frontier: the show that examines cultural representati…
My First Kid
48
NGH '23 • December 2022
Opening scene: my wife’s going into labor. I watch a lot of TV, so I know what to do. “…
Ray Charles
12
HBF '19 • December 2020
For forty years I’ve been Ray Charles’s private caretaker, helping make his dreams come…
Dinosaur Story
25
FOD '24 • May 2022
Tour Guide: We’ve finally reached the Chicxulub crater, everyone, the site of the explosion t…
At The Airport With My Least Favorite Uncle
10
ENO '21 • April 2020
Uncle: Hey, Martin! Martin! Sit with me! Martin: I gotta get on my plane. Uncle: Where’re y…
Tales of Vengeance
11
MAG '21-'22 • September 2021
For our upcoming issue, we asked some Lampoon subscribers to write in to share stories about times …
Elvis's Draft Letter
87
LKN '25 • March 2023
This message is addressed to Presley, Elvis. Dear Sir: You are hereby notified that you have been…
An Undercover Cop In The Movie ‘Footloose’
MFP '23-24 • May 2021
Psssst. Hey kids. Yeah you guys. Looking for a good time? I could help you out with some purchases …
Hottest Girls In School
12
YMC '21-'22 • December 2021
And, action. Open on the Three Hottest Girls in school, walking in unison, places in all the…
Playwriting
56
JLN '21-22 • February 2020
Last Monday they caught me playwriting during detention. “Well well well, what do we h…
My Relationship
8
ZPH '12 • February 2010
… is like any other, especially the kind where one partner steals from the other, day after …
The Big Prank
23
JFAR '19-'22 • August 2019
Justin wants nothing more than to be friends with his next-door-neighbor Nate. They’ve been w…
Blockbuster
22
MAG '21-'22 • October 2020
The year is 2004. It’s Friday in 2004. You head to the Blockbuster in 2004 with your dad to r…
Olympic Curling
6
MFP '23-24 •
Me: Hello, I’d like one ticket to watch the gold medal curling match, please. Cashier: I&rsq…
There’s No More Gazpacho In The Cupboard
11
MMM '20 • October 2020
– What? – There’s no more cans of gazpacho in our cupboard. The hell am I suppos…
Dear Historians,
SWR '19-'20 • March 2020
At the time of writing, the COVID-19 pandemic has brought the world to a standstill. Though the Lam…
Dougle
114
AAD '23-'24 • May 2022
The Life of a Cowboy
85
AJ '18 • December 2020
I was only five years old when my grandpappy taught me how to shoot a gun. “Pull the trigger …
Goin’ West
DRM '18 • December 2020
Uh oh. I did it again. Fell asleep after all the kids got on the bus, so now I gotta get all these …
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