Larry Purchases A Masturbation Bot – The Harvard Lampoon

Larry VS. The Infernal Machine #

| Issue Editor: BWM '19 | Art Editor: BC '19

Larry Purchases A Masturbation Bot

  MAK '21

Larry: Power on

Masturbation Bot 3000: (turns on, starts fingering self) 

Larry: Jesus… This is perfect.

Masturbation Bot 3000: (masturbating)

Larry: Oh yeah, baby, I can’t wait until I’m inside of you.

Masturbation Bot 3000: (masturbating)

Larry: Would you like that? Talk to me, beautiful.

Masurbation Bot 3000: (masturbating) 

Larry: Can I fuck you? 

Masturbation Bot 3000: (masturbating)

Larry: Oh my god. You don’t have a pussy hole. It’s basically a MIDI keyboard down here.

Masturbation Bot 3000: (masturbating)

Larry: … Hello? … Are you there?

Masturation Bot 3000: (climaxes and powers off)

Larry: (cums in pants, begrudgingly)