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Crimson Parody
Spring ’26
The Lampoon's Spring 2026 parody of the Harvard Crimson
The Latest
A Performative Feminist
Book Smart# • by JRC '27
When it comes to performative feminism...
Interview With Bear Grylls
Before I Go# • by DKN ’27
Edward Michael “Bear” Grylls is a British adventurer best known for...
Britannica
Book Smart# • by JGLH '25-'26
A witch cursed me at the county fair...
Jester
Before I Go# • by AAW '28
Is it just me, or...
Home From Outer Space
Skin of my Teeth# • by GMB '28
I can’t wait to see what my son’s been up to these past 20 years...
Ethical Zoo
Book Smart# • by LNW '27
Hey kiddos, welcome to City Zoo...
There’s No Nobel Prize For Grilling
Book Smart# • by JGLH '25-'26
My greatest dream in life is to perfect the art of grilling...
Poll
Skin of my Teeth# • by LKN '25
So how are my numbers looking...
Salem Witch Trials
Before I Go# • by SEH '26
People of Salem, stop this madness...
How I Escaped by the Skin of my Teeth From Prison
Skin of my Teeth# • by AWE '27
The other day I got locked up in prison for going out on the town...
Poo Gun
Skin of my Teeth# • by GMB '28
I was born with a poo gun in my hand...
Tips for Succeeding in Improv
Before I Go# • by LNW '27
Know When to Keep a Scene Going...
Deep Cuts
My First Real Piece Ever
The ▵S=Sf – Si = ∫dQ/T # • by DJL '20
This is not a real piece, just my observation about pieces, and I am a human writing this, a perfect...
The Death of Kenzo Simmons
One Last Dance # • by BWM '19-'21
-Welcome to heaven. Please state your name, occupation, and cause of death.
-Wow, so you must be S...
Waking Up From A Coma
Entirely Secret & Completely Optional # • by AWE '27
Hey Bruce, how’d you sleep? I hope it was good, because we have a lot to discuss now that you’re awake. Remember Jibbly from our wedding...
Wheel of Fortune
Upside Up # • by MFP '23-24
Contestant #1: I’d like to solve the puzzle:
Host: Go right ahead.
_’D L_KE T_ BUY _ V_W...
Golf Course Dispute
The Posthumous Writings of B.R. Tanglord # • by MFEC '27
FORE! Aw, dammit. I shanked it again...
Prisoner’s Dilemma
Family Friendly Comedy # • by EBC '22-'23
Sitting handcuffed in the interrogation room, I started to sweat. They had the room at a cool 65, bu...
Missy Manners
Classics # • by ghost
Okay, so you’re in the cafeteria. They’re serving peas. The boy across from you is throwing peas lik...
Letter to the Future
Mutually Assured Destruction # • by MFP '23-24
Dear lame-o’s 50 years from now,
You guys don’t know it yet, but you’ve gotta be the biggest pussie...
Horses
Justice Is Served # • by CLHC '26
I first saw her in English class. After a quick forty-minute search of Google, I found out that she ...
Paranoia
Entirely Secret & Completely Optional # • by CYL '26
Kevin: Umm, I guess I would have to say Amy...
My Dating Life
The Posthumous Writings of B.R. Tanglord # • by GCLS '27
When I hit puberty...
Colonizing Mars
Mutually Assured Destruction # • by GPCP '22
Mission control, I’ve successfully landed on Mars. Terraforming will take a few weeks since it’s j...