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Crimson Parody
Fall '25
The Lampoon's Fall 2025 parody of the Harvard Crimson
The Latest
Snoopy's B-Plot
The POW! # • by LKN '25
It’s Saint Patrick’s Day, and CHARLIE BROWN and HIS FRIENDS are searching for four-leaf shamrocks. But, every shamrock Charlie pulls turns out to be a regular rock...
What Would You Do?
Entirely Secret & Completely Optional # • by RB '26
What Would You Do? is a hidden camera show where ordinary citizens face moral dilemmas...
How To: Human Shield
The POW! # • by CLHC '26
When you get selected to be a human shield you must accept the fact that these are your last few minutes alive...
Vice President
The POW! # • by HTM '26
We look great in this inauguration photo, Mr. President! Can you just do me a small favor and have the media guys edit out the bunny ears...
Moments Before Impact
The POW! # • by CLHC '26
American wiretaps recorded various conversations among the residents of Hiroshima...
Job Application: Pizza Hut Delivery Driver
The POW! # • by The Harvard Lampoon
None of your goddam business...
If I Were A Horse
Entirely Secret & Completely Optional # • by DKN ’27
I’m not a horse yet, but here’s things I will do if I become one...
Triage
The POW! # • by CLHC '26
How To: Mexican Standoffs
The POW! # • by MSS ’25
The first thing you will need to do is point a gun at a guy...
Profile: Dirt Bike Baby
The POW! # • by HTM '26
Some say that the most unusual thing about Dirt Bike Baby is his dirt bike...
Barbie Gets Breast Cancer
Entirely Secret & Completely Optional # • by KMB '26
Welcome to the first support group meeting for Barbies with Cancer. Please help yourself to some Easy-Bake banana bread...
Sound Syndrome
The POW! # • by RSA '25
My wife can’t stand me now because whenever I try dirty talk...
Deep Cuts
The Talk Throughout History
Me and My Lovers # • by MAV '23-'24
Eve: I think that’s the wrong hole.Adam: Again?? I really wish we had parents to sit us down and exp...
Sisyphus
Imaginary Friends # • by DKN ’27
I’m almost identical to Sisyphus, except...
Hindenburg
The Quixotic # • by MRB '25
Only 35 of the 97 total passengers were killed in the Hindenburg Blimp disaster. This has really tak...
A Note From the House in the Clouds
Upside Up # • by SAB '24
If you’re reading this, congratulations: you’ve caught my note! Please save me. A few weeks ago, I s...
Condolences
README # • by OECGP ’22-’24
Tue, Jun 9, 2:47 PM
Hey bud, I was super bummed to see that obituary about you this morning. Big co...
TV Salesman
For Your Consideration # • by ZDG '20
Bread the TV Salesman started the day like any other: with a hot cup of coffee and a curse to his mo...
Tommy the Tank
Mutually Assured Destruction # • by JRD '22-'23
The predecessor to Thomas the Tank Engine, this anthropomorphic military vehicle teaches children li...
Girlfriend
The Unstoppable March # • by GPCP '22
Of course I have a girlfriend, she just goes to another school. Which school? The, uh, the one a few...
An Undercover Cop In The Movie ‘Footloose’
One Last Dance # • by MFP '23-24
Psssst. Hey kids. Yeah you guys. Looking for a good time? I could help you out with some purchases w...
Hammurabi
The Unstoppable March # • by ZDG '20
After the success of his first 282 laws, the Babylonian lawgiver released a less popular but more nu...
How Cancer Eventually Got Cured
The Unstoppable March # • by YMC '21-'22
Before you say anything, we know what you’re thinking: why should you care that cancer eventually go...
World's Nicest People Convention
Mutually Assured Destruction # • by BGS '22-'23
-That was an excellent dinner. Should we get the check?-Sure. This one’s on me. -No, please, I’ve go...