What’s New
Imaginary Friends #
Spring 2024
This issue is not real, but merely a figment of your imagination...
Suburbia #
Winter 2023
This is the Suburbia # because I grew up in the suburbs, and also because the only thing I’m afraid ...
Check it Out
Crimson Parody
Spring ’25
The Lampoon's Spring 2025 parody of the Harvard Crimson
The Latest
Red Dye 40
Suburbia # • by EAT '24
I walk in the door, yoga pants bunched tight around my middle-aged buttocks. My husband thinks I’m g...
Pool Rules
Suburbia # • by SEH '26
Children under the age of 14 may not use the pool without a parent or guardian present, unless the...
Draft Dodging
The Quixotic # • by RYSL
The national draft is underway, and as an amputee I’m terrified of active combat. Thankfully, I’m in...
Accountant
The Quixotic # • by OMA '24
Those files better say that I can buy a boat, Gene. My wife loves boats. My girlfriend loves boats...
Incentives
Suburbia # • by MRB '25
Ever since I earned my online economics nanodegree, I’ve been controlling my fourth-grade class usin...
Confessional
README # • by SMR '25
Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned...
Morning Announcements
Suburbia # • by SEH '26
Good morning Vietnam! No, it's not Robin Williams. I know everyone gets excited every time I do that...
Conditional Love
Imaginary Friends # • by EB '24
Would you still date me if I had feet for hands...
Modern Mom Gritty Reboot
The Quixotic # • by CLC '22-'23
(Lights up. Camera pans over a grayscale suburb.)
VOICEOVER: The modern mom is secure.
(Flash: a p...
Sisyphus
Imaginary Friends # • by DKN ’27
I’m almost identical to Sisyphus, except...
Bob Golf
The Quixotic # • by JKF '25
“How was your summer, Bob Golf?” chuckles the hottest guy in school. I like to stand behind him in t...
Puritan Party
The Quixotic # • by RYSL
Hey. (gurgles) You think this is allowed? (spits)
It’s not even really drinking, man!
Cool. How...
Deep Cuts
Going to America
The Quixotic # • by LKN '25
Grandpa says that in America, the streets are paved with gold and the water is made of milk and hone...
Brain Man
README # • by JKF '25
Knock knock. Hey silly. It’s me. The deceased 50 year old man who has permanently moved into...
Change Jar
One Last Dance # • by KPB
i am texting from the faculty lounge and i am looking at the Change Jar in front of me and it appear...
The Talk
Me and My Lovers # • by LRK '21-'22
My Birth
Mom: It’s a boy!
Me: Hey, girl, what’s up? What you doing later, sexy mama?
Mom: I’m b...
Fortune Teller Comix
Smellfungus # • by MAK '21
Murphy's Law
Upside Up # • by IKI '26
Inventing the Wheel
The Unstoppable March # • by MFP '23-24
Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce to you… the wheel! (Roaring applause)
Just what exactly does it d...
A Gentlemanly Cop
Justice Is Served # • by DCCP '25
Good evening, Mademoiselle.
[I tip my hat and reveal a smaller fancier hat]
You’re under arrest fo...
May I Approach the Bench?
Justice Is Served # • by OMA '24
You may, but keep it quick, I have five minutes until Judge Judy comes on, and I’m going to have t...
Non-Confrontational Judge
Justice Is Served # • by JKF '25
Thank you all so much for showing up to the courthouse this morning, even in the rain. Over the past...
Van Gogh
The Proper Bostonians # • by JKF '25
“Let’s start this interview with a simple question. Van, in just a few sentences, how did you become...
Econdoms
Lampy Sells Out # • by WLU '25