The Harvard Lampoon

What’s New

Imaginary Friends #

Imaginary Friends #

This issue is not real, but merely a figment of your imagination...

Suburbia #

This is the Suburbia # because I grew up in the suburbs, and also because the only thing I’m afraid ...

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Crimson Parody

The Lampoon's Spring 2025 parody of the Harvard Crimson

The Latest

Imaginary Friends # • by DKN ’27

I’m almost identical to Sisyphus, except...

Lover in the Night Comix

The Quixotic # • by AMC '23

New Best Friend

The Quixotic # • by SEH '26

This guy Brian showed up in my shower last night. The water wasn’t on, he was just reading a c...

Suburban Journaling

Suburbia # • by JKF '25

On summer nights, I would sit by the train tracks. There wasn’t much to do around town except go to ...

Suburbia # • by SEH '26

Children under the age of 14 may not use the pool without a parent or guardian present, unless the...

One for the Road Comix

Suburbia # • by MIC '26

Imaginary Friends # • by MSS ’25

Joey Chestnut is a competitive eater and sixteen-time winner...

Suburbia # • by CYL '26

Most people move to Hogtown for the good public schools. They either come for that or Larry the 2,0...

Suburbia # • by EAT '24

I walk in the door, yoga pants bunched tight around my middle-aged buttocks. My husband thinks I’m g...

Suburban Safari Comix

Suburbia # • by DCCP '25

Imaginary Friends # • by BJS ’25

Hey, Dave? You know that unicorn piñata...

The Quixotic # • by JKF '25

“How was your summer, Bob Golf?” chuckles the hottest guy in school. I like to stand behind him in t...

Deep Cuts

Upside Up # • by NGH '23

First rule of being the new kid is to look out for bullies. I see a bully in the bathroom threatenin...

README # • by FOD '24

My story begins with me working as an engineer on one of the first computers in the world, whe...

Dead of Night # • by DRM '18

To Our Valued Customers, I regret to inform you that here at Frank’s Drugstore and Candy Emporium w...

My Anime Fanfiction

Me and My Lovers # • by JEC '21

You wake up in your high school dorm. Umaru-chan, your roommate / stepsister who is also your girlfr...

The Mental Health Issue # • by MAG '21-'22

Before dying of liver failure, action stuntman Laser Danger said some of the coolest things uttere...

The Mental Health Issue # • by MAG '21-'22

At a sleepover. Kyle: Whoa! Brian what is that on your shorts?Brian: Uh, nothing! Kyle: Hey guys ...

Things I Want to Tell Stacy Now That I’m No Longer In Eighth Grade

Manic Pursuit # • by KMM

– I was the one who kind of initiated the tradition of everyone hugging each other at the end of cla...

The Trial of the Decade

Family Friendly Comedy # • by MMM '20

Frankly, it seemed certain that Marco would get lunch detention. Frank Lee, our principal, along wit...

Alien Abduction

Mutually Assured Destruction # • by EBC '22-'23

I was lying in bed, trying to work up the courage to masturbate. There was a knock at my window—perf...

Disenchantment Day

The Quixotic # • by CYL '26

Disenchantment Day is my favorite day of the year. I live to shatter the false sense of security ch...

Life in a Bubble

Upside Up # • by NGH '23

I live in a bubble. My body’s been wrapped in bubble wrap enough times to just roll around and eat t...

README # • by MFP '23-24

— (To microphone in the corner of the room) Excuse me? We’re stumped. Could we get a hint? — (Over ...