<ul>
  <li>So how are my numbers looking?</li>
  <li>Not great. Voters aren’t taking well to the name “Leslie Lynch King.”</li>
  <li>What? People ain’t rolling with The Lynch King?</li>
  <li>We really think you should stick with “Gerald Ford”.</li>
  <li>But it’s my birth name! I’m Leslie Lynch King! <em>Pow!</em></li>
  <li>Please let go of my neck.</li>
  <li>What’s wrong with Lynch King?</li>
  <li>Lynching is, er, how should I put this, starting to become a faux pas in America.</li>
  <li>That’s what makes it great! “Look out, I’m gonna lynch ya!” See? Kickass!</li>
  <li>It’s offputting to the American family.</li>
  <li>Aw, grow a spine. I got lynched ten times in the fourth grade.</li>
  <li>What exactly do you think lynching is?</li>
  <li>It’s the only hope America’s got against the wrath of Jimmy Carter.</li>
  <li>Right.</li>
  <li>It’s where they put your head in a toilet, right?</li>
  <li>That’s swirlies. Lynching is when you hang people in public.</li>
  <li>Oh.</li>
</ul>

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