The Count of Monte Cristo Returns to Marseilles – The Harvard Lampoon

Break of Day #

| Issue Editor: NM '17 | Art Editor: BAB '17

The Count of Monte Cristo Returns to Marseilles

  ASB '17 , Art: DKW '19

Count: People of Marseilles! For twenty years you unfairly imprisoned me. Now behold my immense wealth, my fabulous travel balloon, and my fine jewels!

Man: Hallo over there, fellow ballooner! Could you please speed up your travel balloon?

Count: Excuse me? I bought this balloon myself and I think I’ll go as slow as I like.

Salesman: Having balloon problems? Don’t we all! Come on down to the Garage – free lemonade while you wait!

Police: Move along, move along! The air is for all travel balloons.

Count: I’m sorry are there a significant number of these things?

Mayor of Marseilles: Make way for the mayor’s travel balloon!

Count: Mayor Villarde! Remember me, you bastard?

Mayor: My god, you escaped!

Count: I challenge you to a duel!

Mayor: Hmmmm, don’t see how we would do that in travel balloons but I’m sure we can think of something.

Count: You could get off your balloon.

Mayor: Now, now–- that’s no fun.