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Pieces

Girlfriend
40
GPCP '22   •   September 2021
Of course I have a girlfriend, she just goes to another school. Which school? The, uh, the one a fe…
Vanitas
124
CLC '22-'23   •   September 2022
It gives me no joy to say that The Harvard Lampoon is in crisis. The magazine is figuratively tied …
Laser Danger
30
MAG '21-'22   •   January 2022
Before dying of liver failure, action stuntman Laser Danger said some of the coolest things utter…
Draft Dodging
60
RYSL   •   May 2023
The national draft is underway, and as an amputee I’m terrified of active combat. Thankfully,…
Tales of Vengeance
21
MAG '21-'22   •   September 2021
For our upcoming issue, we asked some Lampoon subscribers to write in to share stories about times …
My Piece About What It Would Be Like If I Wrote A Piece for the FYC #
1
CDL '21   •   October 2020
– What started out as a frankly disgusting case of unbelievable obesity had snowballed into a…
1999
10
JLG '21   •   May 2021
At the end of the millennium people started acting weird. January -The “Euro” is intr…
Larry takes a trip on Delta Airlines Flight 460 to Las Vegas
FSS '21   •   March 2020
Patricia: Hello everyone and welcome to Delta Airlines Flight 460 to Las Vegas. My name is Patricia…
Day in the Life Comix
30
IKI '26   •   May 2023
World Famous Worm
60
FOD '24   •   December 2021
We had barely started the road trip when we started seeing the signs advertising the ‘World&r…
Run To End Lung Cancer
69
JLN '21-22   •  
Me: The runners, they’re all...? Ref: All terminally ill lung-cancer patients.  Me: Oh…
Fortune Teller Comix
MAK '21   •   January 2021
An Undercover Cop In The Movie ‘Footloose’
MFP '23-24   •   May 2021
Psssst. Hey kids. Yeah you guys. Looking for a good time? I could help you out with some purchases …
Squigley
10
GPCP '22   •   December 2021
Carl Squigley always had his nose buried in a book, which was buried in a still-flushing toilet. He…
Puritan Party
30
RYSL FOD   •   May 2023
Hey. (gurgles) You think this is allowed? (spits) It’s not even really drinking, man! …
Family
1
JPW '21   •   October 2020
I’ve got a crazy family — two brothers, four sisters, three half-brothers, one quarter-…
The Beat Generation
17
MAG '21-'22   •   March 2019
Jazz flowed from the streets in the 50s. We swam naked in the churches. We prayed in the oceans. We…
School Tour
20
EBC '22-'23   •   November 2019
Hey. Hey you. Yeah, you, freshman. Come here. Not so close. You want to see the real secrets this s…
From the Creators of "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!"
128
LKN '25   •   December 2023
“I Can Totally See This Being Mayonnaise” Margarine “It’s For My Windshiel…
Bus Driver
70
TAF '19   •   May 2018
Uh oh. I did it again. Fell asleep after all the kids got on the bus, so now I gotta get all these …