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Pieces

An Undercover Cop In The Movie ‘Footloose’
MFP '23-24   •   May 2021
Psssst. Hey kids. Yeah you guys. Looking for a good time? I could help you out with some purchases …
Yo Mama So Fat
34
JFAR '19-'22   •   April 2019
-…is the best way I thought I could begin breaking this news, Timmy. I’m so sorry. She…
Heaven
113
CLC '22-'23   •   December 2022
– And the last thing is that the Build-A-Bear is closed Sundays, so you’ll want to plan…
Fire Department Tour
20
SWR '19-'20   •   March 2020
Fire Chief: And this here’s where we do our laundry—(alarm goes off) Oof, sorry kids, t…
Shark Tank U.S.S.R
49
PKS '21-'22   •   October 2020
Host: Welcome to Shark Tank USSR.  Alexei: Privet, sharks. Today I am asking for 0 rubles in …
Judge, Jury, and Executioner
24
TAF '19   •   December 2020
…and now that I’ve got you, I’ll be your judge, jury, and executioner. Wait, …
New Cat
BWM '19-'21   •   December 2020
So a couple days ago my wife and I decided to restart the old marriage. Seeing as I’m impoten…
The Last Tiger’s Deathbed
24
CAS '12   •   May 2021
It was a rainy night in November and at the Bronx Zoo a crowd of hundreds of thousands braved the e…
Sometimes when I’m thinking…
12
MAG '21-'22   •   November 2020
Sometimes when I’m thinking about doing something a little devil will pop up on one of my sho…
Funding Needed for Life-Saving Surgery
251
EB '24   •   May 2022
(二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二)$0 raised out of $50000 Please donate to my life-saving surgery. I cannot …
My Piece About What It Would Be Like If I Wrote A Piece for the FYC #
1
CDL '21   •   October 2020
– What started out as a frankly disgusting case of unbelievable obesity had snowballed into a…
Charlie and the Next Successor
11
JGS '20   •   November 2019
It was time for old Charlie to pick the next child to take over the chocolate factory just as Willy…
A Retelling of Jaws By Someone Who Has Definitely Seen It
16
FSS '21   •   October 2020
Jaws…yes. Jaws is the story of a very big shark. Everyone knows that. Especially those who h…
Ray Charles
12
HBF '19   •   December 2020
For forty years I’ve been Ray Charles’s private caretaker, helping make his dreams come…
Business Presentation
11
CDL '21   •   June 2018
ME: And by subverting double axial capital inflows we can mobilize revenue twice as fast. SMITH: I…
Oliver Twist
14
RYSL   •   September 2022
Ladies and gentlemen, tonight I have the honor of performing the annual orphan monologue for this y…
Visit California
134
EAT '24   •   May 2022
Bronze Age Teen Drama
122
JRD '22-'23   •   July 2021
Open on a mother and a son. In front of a forge. The work is hard, and the hours are long. -Mom, I…
Dialogue Options in Fallout: New Cambridge
91
JTK '24   •   May 2022
Stranger: Hey there traveler! Is there anything I can help you with?   [1] I’m very hu…
The Time I Got Caught Milking
22
YMC '21-'22   •   February 2020
One time I was at the farm, milking some cows when Bobby, the guy that owns the farm, comes out run…