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Pieces
How to Handle Being in a Long Distance Relationship
79
CYL '26 • March 2023
1) College is busy, so it is important to set up a schedule with your significant other. When…
Olympic Curling
6
MFP '23-24 •
Me: Hello, I’d like one ticket to watch the gold medal curling match, please. Cashier: I&rsq…
Exam Locations
8
MJS '19 • May 2018
Last Names A- Y: Harding Room 2121 Last Name Zanderson: Arrive at the boarded up Liquor-Max on Was…
Hottest Girls In School
12
YMC '21-'22 • December 2021
And, action. Open on the Three Hottest Girls in school, walking in unison, places in all the…
Horses
318
CLHC '26 • May 2023
I first saw her in English class. After a quick forty-minute search of Google, I found out that she…
Male Introspection
124
AMC '23 •
Run To End Lung Cancer
69
JLN '21-22 •
Me: The runners, they’re all...? Ref: All terminally ill lung-cancer patients. Me: Oh…
Squigley
10
GPCP '22 • December 2021
Carl Squigley always had his nose buried in a book, which was buried in a still-flushing toilet. He…
Dinner Date
6
BGS '22-'23 • November 2020
Lindsey: It is so hot that you speak French, Jack.Jack: Ah, but how else would I order . . . la cr&…
Things I Want to Tell Stacy Now That I’m No Longer In Eighth Grade
40
KMM • February 2010
– I was the one who kind of initiated the tradition of everyone hugging each other at the end…
History Class
50
AHG '25 •
Teacher: …and that is why so many of us are related to Genghis Khan. Jimmy: Related? To a w…
Inspired Musings
1
BWM '19-'21 • December 2020
Scientists say that the murder rate goes up when there is a full moon. But so does the rate of peop…
Krauts
11
BWM '19-'21 • October 2020
Legend has it while serving in the trenches in WWI Wittgenstein would masturbate to math. German S…
Voice-Activated Lights
155
SMR '25 • March 2023
— I’m excited to see your new place finally.— Here, let me turn on the lights. AH…
Inventing the Wheel
8
MFP '23-24 • July 2021
Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce to you… the wheel! (Roaring applause) Just what exac…
Crowdsourcing Request
1
TBW '18 • December 2020
Hey Guys!I’m sending you this email to invite you to help with my crowdfunding campaign. I&r…
Family
1
JPW '21 • October 2020
I’ve got a crazy family — two brothers, four sisters, three half-brothers, one quarter-…
Trading Up
46
EB '24 • September 2022
In 2005, Kyle MacDonald successfully traded up from a paperclip to a house. – Starti…
Lolita
102
NGH '23 • December 2022
Lolita, light of my life, I feel fire in my loins. I lit my underwear on fire for you, Lolita. No o…
Red Dye 40
83
EAT '24 • December 2023
I walk in the door, yoga pants bunched tight around my middle-aged buttocks. My husband thinks I&rs…
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