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Pieces

Driving a Plane
42
EAT '24   •   September 2021
As I’m driving a plane down the highway, airport control radio crackles in, “Unit 332, …
Fortune Teller Comix
MAK '21   •   January 2021
Birthday Card
20
RIP '09   •   October 2008
GRANDFATHER: Here’s a card from me. Happy birthday. SON: Thanks, grandpa. MOTHER: Read it a…
Safari
2
BWM '19-'21   •   September 2020
“And here you’ll see the world’s fastest animal, the cheetah. A beautiful example…
There’s No More Gazpacho In The Cupboard
12
MMM '20   •   October 2020
– What? – There’s no more cans of gazpacho in our cupboard. The hell am I suppos…
At a wedding reception
9
SWR '19-'20   •   October 2020
Well, here goes nothing… (jumps up on table) Ahem! Mr. and Mrs. Martinez, I can’t le…
The Woods
72
JLN '21-22   •   November 2019
I bring you out here at the end of summer every year. You notice that? My father did the same. My f…
Crowdsourcing Request
1
TBW '18   •   December 2020
Hey Guys!I’m sending you this email to invite you to help with my crowdfunding campaign. I&r…
Judge, Jury, and Executioner
24
TAF '19   •   December 2020
…and now that I’ve got you, I’ll be your judge, jury, and executioner. Wait, …
Fat Camp
120
JLG '21   •   March 2019
My parents said they knew I could lose the weight on my own, but it’d be so much easier for t…
Hit, That, Button
10
BWM '19-'21   •   October 2018
“How you folks doin tonight!?” Wooot, wooooooot! “Coming at you from the city o…
Brinkmanship
36
CLC '22-'23   •   May 2022
“The ability to get to the verge without getting into the war is the necessary art” &nd…
Inspired Musings
1
BWM '19-'21   •   December 2020
Scientists say that the murder rate goes up when there is a full moon. But so does the rate of peop…
Allergy
52
LKN '25   •   March 2023
Molly: Oh Jon, this sunset picnic is so romantic…are you…crying? Jon: Sorry, *sniff*…
Whale Watching
11
HJH '19   •   October 2020
Guide: And here we have a FULL ORCA BREACH FOLKS A FULL BREACH! 9 O’CLOCK!!! Crowd: Wow! Ga…
Medical Report
72
EPS '24   •  
I have this disease where everyday at 3 am three dudes kick the shit out of me.  It started p…
Vanitas
JLG '21   •   October 2020
Dear Judging Committee for the American Society for Magazine Editors, I notice you have not been r…
Stars
13
NGH '23   •   June 2021
-Wow, you’re right, stargazing is pretty cool. -Stare long enough, and apparently you start …
Best Picture
4
BWM '19-'21   •   October 2020
But just what a year for movies! All my friends tell me, they tell me George Clooney, you love movi…
Brain Man
42
JKF '25   •   March 2023
Knock knock. Hey silly. It’s me. The deceased 50 year old man who has permanently mov…