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Pieces

Frat Boy
55
NGH '23   •   December 2021
There’s nothing cooler than being a frat boy.  Picture this. I’m sitting on the f…
r/women Comix
37
AMC '23   •   March 2023
Kashan Rugs
10
EAH   •   May 2022
Tales of Vengeance
21
MAG '21-'22   •   September 2021
For our upcoming issue, we asked some Lampoon subscribers to write in to share stories about times …
Excerpts From the Great American Novel
84
JLN '21-22   •   February 2020
It was time for them to head west with just the shirts on their backs and the shirts on their legs.…
A Man with a Limp and Three Glass Eyes
4
BWM '19-'21   •   December 2020
Who am I? I’m the guy who sits in the bar all day and waits for some tall dark and handsome h…
Buzzer
45
GPL '21-'22   •   November 2019
– Hey dude how do we know our pizza is ready for pick-up? – The buzzer they gave us. …
Escape Room
63
MFP '23-24   •   March 2023
— (To microphone in the corner of the room) Excuse me? We’re stumped. Could we get a hi…
Life After the Lampoon
18
JFAR '19-'22   •   August 2019
Conan O’Brien: Juan, congrats on graduating! Here, take this. Me: Wow, another Ferrari! Con…
Biome
OTLB '13   •   July 2021
Life ‘em up, boys. That’s what our sergeant used to say. Our job was to create the bigg…
Amnesia
1
GPL '21-'22   •   October 2019
– John? I mean uh, excuse me random stranger? – What do you want? – I have amne…
The Dust Bowl
LGF '21-'22   •   December 2020
Football is not what it used to be. During my golden years, AKA the Great Depression, we were all i…
Springtime Getaway
23
OMA '24   •   September 2021
Hello! Welcome to Go Chase Happiness And Dreams Travel Agency.  Hi, my 8-months pregna…
An Undercover Cop In The Movie ‘Footloose’
MFP '23-24   •   May 2021
Psssst. Hey kids. Yeah you guys. Looking for a good time? I could help you out with some purchases …
Bus Driver
70
TAF '19   •   May 2018
Uh oh. I did it again. Fell asleep after all the kids got on the bus, so now I gotta get all these …
Run To End Lung Cancer
69
JLN '21-22   •  
Me: The runners, they’re all...? Ref: All terminally ill lung-cancer patients.  Me: Oh…
Lobotomy
97
GPCP '22   •   January 2022
I sit down at the lunch table with a pruning saw and a smile. “Well, boys, I finally did it. …
Condolences
61
OECGP ’22-’24   •   March 2023
Tue, Jun 9, 2:47 PM Hey bud, I was super bummed to see that obituary about you this morning. Big c…
That Guy
BWM '19-'21   •   March 2020
-Hey, who is that?-That guy, over there? I don’t know.-He must be pretty important-What makes…
Chivalry is Dead
119
JGB '25   •   May 2023
When I mention this to women, they usually say it’s not dead it’s just changed with the…