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Pieces

Hogtown
44
CYL '26   •   December 2023
Most people move to Hogtown for the good public schools.  They either come for that or Larry t…
D-Day Picnic
ZDG '20   •   June 2020
Soldiers: (storm the beach) (lots of explosions) Father: What the heck we’re having a picnic…
Dinosaur Story
25
FOD '24   •   May 2022
Tour Guide: We’ve finally reached the Chicxulub crater, everyone, the site of the explosion t…
Trading Up
46
EB '24   •   September 2022
In 2005, Kyle MacDonald successfully traded up from a paperclip to a house.   – Starti…
Crazy Parents
4
JBO '10   •   October 2008
CRAZY PARENTS are a huge problem for all of us. But are your parents crazy in a comedy way, or a re…
The Trial of the Decade
17
MMM '20   •   October 2020
Frankly, it seemed certain that Marco would get lunch detention. Frank Lee, our principal, along wi…
Condolences
61
OECGP ’22-’24   •   March 2023
Tue, Jun 9, 2:47 PM Hey bud, I was super bummed to see that obituary about you this morning. Big c…
A Knight's Quest
96
RYSL   •  
The object of your next quest is to smite a dragon. No, not ‘he.’ This dragon is female…
Accountant
58
OMA '24   •   May 2023
Those files better say that I can buy a boat, Gene. My wife loves boats. My girlfriend loves boat…
Larry Purchases a Masturbation Bot
Anonymous   •   March 2020
Larry: Power on Masturbation Bot 3000: (turns on, starts fingering self)  Larry: Jesus&helli…
My Piece About What It Would Be Like If I Wrote A Piece for the FYC #
1
CDL '21   •   October 2020
– What started out as a frankly disgusting case of unbelievable obesity had snowballed into a…
A Gentlemanly Cop
43
DCCP '25   •   May 2023
Good evening, Mademoiselle. [I tip my hat and reveal a smaller fancier hat] You’re under ar…
Change Jar
4
KPB   •   May 2021
i am texting from the faculty lounge and i am looking at the Change Jar in front of me and it appea…
Hell
13
MAG '21-'22   •   November 2020
There’s a special place in hell for weird guys who can’t be kept in the regular part of…
Vanitas
JLG '21   •   October 2020
Dear Judging Committee for the American Society for Magazine Editors, I notice you have not been r…
Elvis Has Left the Building
63
Robert Carlock '95   •   November 2020
ANNOUNCER: “Elvis has left the building!” TEENAGE FANS: “(Scream)!” ANNOU…
The Big Prank
23
JFAR '19-'22   •   August 2019
Justin wants nothing more than to be friends with his next-door-neighbor Nate. They’ve been w…
New Partner
20
JFAR '19-'22   •   January 2016
A cop’s #1 belief: I’m not gonna be the jerkoff that shoots his own partner. I live and…
Birthday Card
20
RIP '09   •   October 2008
GRANDFATHER: Here’s a card from me. Happy birthday. SON: Thanks, grandpa. MOTHER: Read it a…
DrivingInstructor.ai
135
EB '24   •   May 2022
I get in the car, and I’m doing everything by the book. I’m checking my mirrors, both h…