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Pieces
Why I Wish I Was a Green Boy Instead of a Blue Boy
27
BWM '19-'21 • December 2020
I was born a blue boy, but my whole life I’ve wanted to be a big green boy. Green boys get to…
The Taco Bell on Beverly
30
HBF '19 • January 2020
“Where are you going?” you ask the homeless man wandering down San Vicente. “Don&…
Marco Polo
16
HJH '19 • March 2019
Marco Polo travelled the world trading spices, documenting his experiences. Today, I entered the c…
The Last Tiger’s Deathbed
24
CAS '12 • May 2021
It was a rainy night in November and at the Bronx Zoo a crowd of hundreds of thousands braved the e…
Advice For A New CIA Agent
15
HHD • October 2008
Welcome to your first day in the CIA. First of all, congratulations. If you’re an agent, you …
Condolences
61
OECGP ’22-’24 • March 2023
Tue, Jun 9, 2:47 PM Hey bud, I was super bummed to see that obituary about you this morning. Big c…
Springtime Getaway
23
OMA '24 • September 2021
Hello! Welcome to Go Chase Happiness And Dreams Travel Agency. Hi, my 8-months pregna…
Playwriting
56
JLN '21-22 • February 2020
Last Monday they caught me playwriting during detention. “Well well well, what do we h…
The History of Hats
3
JPW '21 • October 2020
There are all types of hats, like silver or classic. But hats haven’t always dominated our co…
Buzzer
45
GPL '21-'22 • November 2019
– Hey dude how do we know our pizza is ready for pick-up? – The buzzer they gave us. …
How Long Have You Been Unemployed?
9
LRK '21-'22 • October 2020
Uncle Buck: That’s an incredibly personal question. Me: I’m just asking because I&rsqu…
Late
204
JTK '24 • January 2022
I look down at the watch tattooed on my wrist. It’s 10:00. Fuck. I look up at my wall clock t…
Hamilton
140
JLN '21-22 • October 2020
This is the real story of something that occurred to me in 2008. John Weidman ‘68: I hear we…
Van Gogh
60
JKF '25 • September 2022
“Let’s start this interview with a simple question. Van, in just a few sentences, how d…
Cruising Altitude
2
MFP '23-24 • September 2021
Good evening passengers, this is your doctor speaking. Yeah, you heard that right. Everybody know…
Municipal Archive of Brain Chips in Dalignfort, VA 2077-2122
12
EAT EB •
Folder 4: Security Tapes (Wal-mart) 2099 Man: (spilling 2,000 FlexSeal onto conveyor belt) Sorry, …
Fight Song
6
JFAR '19-'22 • October 2018
This is the fight song for John Wayne Gacy, the Murderer, High School. JWG High We Love You …
Real Estate Tour
6
HFJ '18 • October 2018
-And here’s the pantry. -What’s with these marks on the wall? -We marked our son&rsqu…
Surf Trip
47
HJH '19 • December 2020
I’ll never forget the summer I road-tripped to Hawaii with my two best friends. While it star…
Wheel of Fortune
31
MFP '23-24 • December 2022
Contestant #1: I’d like to solve the puzzle: Host: Go right ahead. _’D L_KE &n…
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