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Pieces

Stars
13
NGH '23   •   June 2021
-Wow, you’re right, stargazing is pretty cool. -Stare long enough, and apparently you start …
Birthday Card
20
RIP '09   •   October 2008
GRANDFATHER: Here’s a card from me. Happy birthday. SON: Thanks, grandpa. MOTHER: Read it a…
Next in Line Comix
21
MIC '26   •   May 2023
Science Class
171
NGH '23   •   December 2022
Tommy: Aggghhh! It burns! It burns! (pulls safety shower lever)  Mr. Miller: Tommy, this can&…
Squigley
10
GPCP '22   •   December 2021
Carl Squigley always had his nose buried in a book, which was buried in a still-flushing toilet. He…
Cheat Codes for Ace Attorney
126
LKN '25   •   May 2023
085888C8 60000000 Win every court case0452FDBC 10000000 Infinite evidence0452FDBC 0FFFFFFF Finite, …
Video Game Pitch
23
JRD '22-'23   •  
Sit down gentlemen, I have our next hit game. You thought Sonic The Hedgehog made us rich? Well Son…
Operation Enduring Freedom
BWM '19-'21   •   October 2020
George Bush:  Good afternoon. On my orders the United States military has begun coordinated at…
Hammurabi
15
ZDG '20   •   July 2021
After the success of his first 282 laws, the Babylonian lawgiver released a less popular but more n…
If It Were Big Bird
MAK '21   •   May 2021
In 1986, instead of an elementary school teacher, NASA had initially considered Big Bird as their f…
The History of Hats
3
JPW '21   •   October 2020
There are all types of hats, like silver or classic. But hats haven’t always dominated our co…
Driving a Plane
42
EAT '24   •   September 2021
As I’m driving a plane down the highway, airport control radio crackles in, “Unit 332, …
Narcissus Eiffel-Towering
125
NGH '23 AMC '23   •  
‘Tucket
109
JLN '21-22   •   June 2020
Hot Babes. Everywhere. Oyster season baby. Oyster. Fucking. Season. Summer on the ‘Tuck. If y…
Letter to Roosevelt
10
MMM '20   •   January 2020
In 1939, at the urging of physicist Leo Szilárd, Einstein wrote a letter to FDR, informing h…
Vanagon
13
MAS '18   •   December 2020
Ever since I was little, I wanted a vanagon. I worked for fifty years to get one — mailr…
Advice For A New CIA Agent
15
HHD   •   October 2008
Welcome to your first day in the CIA. First of all, congratulations. If you’re an agent, you …
Baseball Ghost
77
GPCP '22   •   May 2023
I clutched my Babe Ruth card in one hand and my necronomicon in the other. “The big game&rsqu…
A Quest
3
ASB '17   •   December 2020
I’m embarking on a quest to personally give a big thumbs-up to the child who made my iPhone. …
Party
48
JKF FOD   •   May 2023
Student: Don, man, what’re you doing at our epic party?  Don Quijote: Ah, you see, I wa…