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Pieces

Titles of Movies I Wrote About Time Travel
10
PKS '21-'22   •   April 2021
-   I Go Back in Time and Kick Dust All Over the JonBenet Ramsey Crime Scene -   I Go B…
Psychic Argument
62
JRD '22-'23   •  
Psychic 1: I told you, I don’t know what happened to your dog! Psychic 2: Then why did I see…
Cryobank Waiting Room
196
JLN '21-22   •   October 2020
-       First time? -       Yeah. Gotta pay rent somehow.  - &…
Crying in the Rain
3
BWM '19-'21   •   October 2020
And I mean yeah they can’t see you cry in the rain, but shit right through your pants? People…
Richard A. Smith: The Hero
52
MFP '23-24   •   December 2021
It’s every kid’s dream to be a superhero, which is why I spend all my time wandering ar…
Run To End Lung Cancer
69
JLN '21-22   •  
Me: The runners, they’re all...? Ref: All terminally ill lung-cancer patients.  Me: Oh…
A Day in the Life of Hamish Olsen, New York, 19
55
CDL '21   •   December 2020
She looked at him like a deer in headlights might look at someone if it had human eyes. Hamish had …
Birthday Card
20
RIP '09   •   October 2008
GRANDFATHER: Here’s a card from me. Happy birthday. SON: Thanks, grandpa. MOTHER: Read it a…
Morning Announcements
117
SEH '26   •   December 2023
Good morning Vietnam! No, it's not Robin Williams. I know everyone gets excited every time I do tha…
Dialogue Piece
44
MFP '23-24   •   March 2023
—  How was your weekend? —  I can’t tell you about things I did …
Leisure Corner
GPL '21-'22   •   March 2020
Welcome to the Leisure Suit’s Larry’s Leisure Corner. Sit down. Relax. Take a break fro…
Online Quiz
15
BWM '19-'21   •   December 2020
Take this short quiz and see if we can guess where you were born! How do you pronounce Mayonnaise?…
Tales of Vengeance
21
MAG '21-'22   •   September 2021
For our upcoming issue, we asked some Lampoon subscribers to write in to share stories about times …
World’s Luckiest & Most Depressed Person
229
JRD '22-'23   •   January 2022
Pam Jensen woke up just like she did every other day – at the exact moment that she could see…
Larry takes a trip on Delta Airlines Flight 460 to Las Vegas
FSS '21   •   March 2020
Patricia: Hello everyone and welcome to Delta Airlines Flight 460 to Las Vegas. My name is Patricia…
Store Closing
DRM '18   •   December 2020
To Our Valued Customers, I regret to inform you that here at Frank’s Drugstore and Candy Emp…
Tech Support Chat
GPL '21-'22   •   October 2020
– Hey is this the–uh–the Niteflirt phone sex line? – No, sorry, this is th…
Yo Mama So Fat
34
JFAR '19-'22   •   April 2019
-…is the best way I thought I could begin breaking this news, Timmy. I’m so sorry. She…
1999
10
JLG '21   •   May 2021
At the end of the millennium people started acting weird. January -The “Euro” is intr…
Larry was there.
BWM '19-'21   •   October 2020
Larry was there. Larry saw the flashes as the troposphere lit on fire, the sounds the bombs made as…