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Pieces

Safari
2
BWM '19-'21   •   September 2020
“And here you’ll see the world’s fastest animal, the cheetah. A beautiful example…
The Trial of the Decade
17
MMM '20   •   October 2020
Frankly, it seemed certain that Marco would get lunch detention. Frank Lee, our principal, along wi…
Biome
OTLB '13   •   July 2021
Life ‘em up, boys. That’s what our sergeant used to say. Our job was to create the bigg…
Eugenics
ASB '17   •   December 2020
– Looks like your baby came out of the eugenics machine beautifully. – Doctor, that is…
Birthday Girl
14
RIP '09   •   October 2008
BIRTHDAY GIRL:  Tonight’s been unbelievable. You are honestly the most amazing friends…
Package Delivery FAQ
27
JGB '25   •  
Q: I had issues receiving the correct product. What should I do? A: Name which of the following sc…
Organ Harvesting
58
JGB '25   •  
Dealer: Just give me the money. Buyer: Hang on. I want to see the goods first. (Dealer motions to…
Ray Charles
12
HBF '19   •   December 2020
For forty years I’ve been Ray Charles’s private caretaker, helping make his dreams come…
If Money Grew On Trees
62
SAB '24   •  
- Environmental protection would be bipartisan. - In the fall, you could substitute real money wit…
Kitchen Sink
18
VG   •   December 2023
For our anniversary, my husband Thomas got me a new sink.  It’s almost as if he’s…
Swearing Kills
54
MFP '23-24   •   May 2022
Hero For A Day
15
MFP '23-24   •  
Mayor: Congrats again on winning the contest Billy! Batman will take it from here. Batman: Alright…
The Life of a Cowboy
86
AJ '18   •   December 2020
I was only five years old when my grandpappy taught me how to shoot a gun. “Pull the trigger …
The Royal We
JFAR '19-'22   •   August 2017
The Royal We was a sitcom about King Arthur and his loyal knight and roommate Sir Elton John Episo…
Charlie and the Next Successor
11
JGS '20   •   November 2019
It was time for old Charlie to pick the next child to take over the chocolate factory just as Willy…
Lifeguard
27
MFP '23-24   •   December 2022
Kid: Help, I’m drowning! Hot Lifeguard: Clint, go get him! Fat Lifeguard: Really?  Ho…
Bronze Age Teen Drama
122
JRD '22-'23   •   July 2021
Open on a mother and a son. In front of a forge. The work is hard, and the hours are long. -Mom, I…
Squigley
10
GPCP '22   •   December 2021
Carl Squigley always had his nose buried in a book, which was buried in a still-flushing toilet. He…
Baseball Ghost
77
GPCP '22   •   May 2023
I clutched my Babe Ruth card in one hand and my necronomicon in the other. “The big game&rsqu…
Rare
1
HJH '19   •   December 2020
Some things are less rare than you think. Winning the Lottery My friend Rigley won the lottery ye…