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Pieces
Squigley
10
GPCP '22 • December 2021
Carl Squigley always had his nose buried in a book, which was buried in a still-flushing toilet. He…
Fireman
59
OMA '24 • December 2022
As a fireman, I face difficult decisions on a daily and nightly basis. For instance, do I take the …
Funding Needed for Life-Saving Surgery
251
EB '24 • May 2022
(二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二二)$0 raised out of $50000 Please donate to my life-saving surgery. I cannot …
Morning Routine
15
HJH '19 • December 2020
8:00am – Wake up and shower. This is easy if you sleep in the shower. 11:30am – Put so…
Taco Tuesday
39
JRD '22-'23 • December 2022
- Can I get two beef tacos please? - Sorry sir, we only …
Change Jar
4
KPB • May 2021
i am texting from the faculty lounge and i am looking at the Change Jar in front of me and it appea…
Vanitas
10
AJ '18 • December 2020
Now that you finally have this issue in your hands, you’re probably wondering one thing and o…
At The Airport With My Least Favorite Uncle
10
ENO '21 • April 2020
Uncle: Hey, Martin! Martin! Sit with me! Martin: I gotta get on my plane. Uncle: Where’re y…
Donate Broth
49
JGB '25 • May 2022
A Retelling of Jaws By Someone Who Has Definitely Seen It
16
FSS '21 • October 2020
Jaws…yes. Jaws is the story of a very big shark. Everyone knows that. Especially those who h…
How I Stopped 9/11
211
RD '24 •
I strut into the hideout, the most beautiful girl Osama bin Laden has ever seen. Osama bin L…
New York
9
BWM '19-'21 • December 2018
Driver (singing): By God! I’m taking this Duck Boat to New York! Passengers (singing togethe…
Puritan Party
30
RYSL FOD • May 2023
Hey. (gurgles) You think this is allowed? (spits) It’s not even really drinking, man! …
Bulimia Recovery Clinic
81
YMC '21-'22 • March 2022
My parents decided to send me to the public Bulimia Recovery Clinic over in Toad Suck, Arkansas the…
Party
49
JKF FOD • May 2023
Student: Don, man, what’re you doing at our epic party? Don Quijote: Ah, you see, I wa…
DrivingInstructor.ai
135
EB '24 • May 2022
I get in the car, and I’m doing everything by the book. I’m checking my mirrors, both h…
My Diwali
4
SAB '24 •
Diwali is a festival of lights that occurs in either October or November and is one of the major fe…
My Speech For Tonight
35
RIP '09 • October 2008
Hi everyone. I’m Jess’s father. Thank you all for coming to Jess’s sweet sixteen.…
My Piece About What It Would Be Like If I Wrote A Piece for the FYC #
1
CDL '21 • October 2020
– What started out as a frankly disgusting case of unbelievable obesity had snowballed into a…
School Tour
20
EBC '22-'23 • November 2019
Hey. Hey you. Yeah, you, freshman. Come here. Not so close. You want to see the real secrets this s…
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