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Pieces
Cold War Frat Boy
300328
SAB '24 • May 2022
Nuclear warheads dropping near the die table. Bombs away, babes. Time for a quick game to 11 before…
Modern Day Barbershop Quartet
4
ZDG '20 • October 2020
Quartet: (singing) Once is a day at a time, twice is looking so fine! Customer: Neat-o! A quartet!…
One Liners
92
NGH '23 •
Business Presentation
11
CDL '21 • June 2018
ME: And by subverting double axial capital inflows we can mobilize revenue twice as fast. SMITH: I…
Missy Manners
126
Josh Lieb '93 • November 2020
Okay, so you’re in the cafeteria. They’re serving peas. The boy across from you is thro…
Cruising Altitude
2
MFP '23-24 • September 2021
Good evening passengers, this is your doctor speaking. Yeah, you heard that right. Everybody know…
Operation Enduring Freedom
BWM '19-'21 • October 2020
George Bush: Good afternoon. On my orders the United States military has begun coordinated at…
2009 Make-A-Wish
51
JGB '25 •
LeBron: Well, it’s been great having you here, bud! (smiles at TV cameras) Kid: Listen, LeBr…
Larry Buys Condoms
20
BWM '19-'21 • March 2020
Larry: Hey, can I get some rubbers. Clerk: Yeah, sure, what kind of johnny you looking for, …
Antidepressants
198
EBC '22-'23 • January 2022
What they don’t tell you about starting antidepressants is that sometimes you’ll try to…
Lifeguard
27
MFP '23-24 • December 2022
Kid: Help, I’m drowning! Hot Lifeguard: Clint, go get him! Fat Lifeguard: Really? Ho…
One for the Road Comix
23
MIC '26 • December 2023
Vanitas
124
CLC '22-'23 • September 2022
It gives me no joy to say that The Harvard Lampoon is in crisis. The magazine is figuratively tied …
Whale Watching
11
HJH '19 • October 2020
Guide: And here we have a FULL ORCA BREACH FOLKS A FULL BREACH! 9 O’CLOCK!!! Crowd: Wow! Ga…
Me & My Babies
7
CDL '21 • November 2020
I milk myself nightly into my tub. My nightly emissions pool in my bath, glistening with a spectral…
Birthday Card
20
RIP '09 • October 2008
GRANDFATHER: Here’s a card from me. Happy birthday. SON: Thanks, grandpa. MOTHER: Read it a…
FOMO Cop
101
SMR '25 • May 2023
There were never any parties where I grew up. Believe me—I asked everybody. For my eighteenth…
Modern Mom
28
CYL '26 • September 2022
My mom isn’t like other moms. When I was conceived, my mother didn’t carry me in …
Excerpts From the Great American Novel
84
JLN '21-22 • February 2020
It was time for them to head west with just the shirts on their backs and the shirts on their legs.…
Middle School Beauty
34
MJS '19 • June 2018
Wendy Perkins is the hottest girl in the 7th grade. She reads at a 6th grade level, but her body i…
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