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Pieces

Larry Buys Condoms
20
BWM '19-'21   •   March 2020
Larry: Hey, can I get some rubbers.  Clerk: Yeah, sure, what kind of johnny you looking for, …
Excerpts From the Great American Novel
84
JLN '21-22   •   February 2020
It was time for them to head west with just the shirts on their backs and the shirts on their legs.…
Lawnmower
21
MAS '18   •   December 2020
Want to stop mowing your lawn like a quivering pussy? Then shut the fuck up and buy the GRASS-FUCKE…
Allergy
52
LKN '25   •   March 2023
Molly: Oh Jon, this sunset picnic is so romantic…are you…crying? Jon: Sorry, *sniff*…
President Nice Guy
30
HFJ '18   •   December 2020
Richard Holton, our first Nice Guy president, eased out of the womb on December 24, 1921, giving do…
Buzzer
45
GPL '21-'22   •   November 2019
– Hey dude how do we know our pizza is ready for pick-up? – The buzzer they gave us. …
Mr. 305
34
FOD '24   •   September 2021
Ever had somebody tell you that you looked like a celebrity? For some it’s a blessing, but fo…
Film Noir
30
MMM '20   •   December 2020
The year was December 17th, winter to be exact. Outside my office it was a wet, dark afternoon&mdas…
Ray Charles
12
HBF '19   •   December 2020
For forty years I’ve been Ray Charles’s private caretaker, helping make his dreams come…
Sometimes when I’m thinking…
12
MAG '21-'22   •   November 2020
Sometimes when I’m thinking about doing something a little devil will pop up on one of my sho…
Heaven
113
CLC '22-'23   •   December 2022
– And the last thing is that the Build-A-Bear is closed Sundays, so you’ll want to plan…
Moon Mine
7
ZDG '20   •   November 2019
A notice to all MoonCorp employees: Gentlemen, this is your CEO. Please keep mining; no reason to …
Rhombus
326
JGB '25   •   May 2023
I have the rare version of the Midas Touch where everything I touch turns into rhombuses. It all st…
Street Fight
MAG '21-'22   •   October 2020
Biker #1: You shouldn’t have knocked that drink out of my hand in there. Now you’re gon…
Lou Bega Gets Married
8
PKS '21-'22   •   July 2019
A little bit of Jenieva in my life A little bit of Jenieva by my side A little bit of Jenieva is …
Texting on My Laptop
19
MAG '21-'22   •   February 2019
Me: Hey Sarah Me: Hey Me: Hey Sarah Me: Hey Sarah, sorry.  Me: I didn’t realize hitt…
Dinosaur Story
25
FOD '24   •   May 2022
Tour Guide: We’ve finally reached the Chicxulub crater, everyone, the site of the explosion t…
QUEER ON THE FRONTIER
8
BWM '19-'21   •   October 2020
Host: Hello and welcome back to Queer on the Frontier: the show that examines cultural representati…
Hell
13
MAG '21-'22   •   November 2020
There’s a special place in hell for weird guys who can’t be kept in the regular part of…
Sleepy Sam
48
JRD '22-'23   •  
Coming soon to a theater near you… (upbeat music playing) Sam Shmorganstein is a zookeeper w…