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Pieces

Choose Your Own Adventure
40
JGB '25   •   May 2022
You are feeling awfully hungry today. What would you like to eat? > A ham sandwich. Keep readi…
Advice For A New CIA Agent
15
HHD   •   October 2008
Welcome to your first day in the CIA. First of all, congratulations. If you’re an agent, you …
Yo Mama So Fat
34
JFAR '19-'22   •   April 2019
-…is the best way I thought I could begin breaking this news, Timmy. I’m so sorry. She…
Whale Watching
11
HJH '19   •   October 2020
Guide: And here we have a FULL ORCA BREACH FOLKS A FULL BREACH! 9 O’CLOCK!!! Crowd: Wow! Ga…
Modern Mom
28
CYL '26   •   September 2022
My mom isn’t like other moms.  When I was conceived, my mother didn’t carry me in …
Larry Buys Condoms
20
BWM '19-'21   •   March 2020
Larry: Hey, can I get some rubbers.  Clerk: Yeah, sure, what kind of johnny you looking for, …
Whack-A-Mole
78
FOD '24   •   January 2022
I walk in every morning and the arcade carny asks me, “what’ll it be?” I reply…
Fieldnotes
34
JKF '25   •   May 2023
In 1954, psychologists infiltrated housewife Dorothy Martin’s UFO doomsday cult.   …
Things To Say If You Want To Join The Cool Table
22
GPCP '22   •   December 2021
Don’t mind me, lemme pull up a chair—backwards. My mom packs me lemon slices instead…
The Death of Kenzo Simmons
10
BWM '19-'21   •   May 2021
-Welcome to heaven. Please state your name, occupation, and cause of death.  -Wow, so you mus…
Jury Duty
253
SAB CLHC   •   May 2023
It’s Monday in Morrison County, and that means the courthouse is open for… business? N…
2019 World Expo
14
SWR '19-'20   •   March 2019
– Attention please, the presentation by Tajikistan will begin in 5 minutes. – (20 minu…
Therapy
94
OMA '24   •   January 2022
Okay, Nathan. Now tell me what you see in this picture.  That’s a headshot of you, bu…
Richard A. Smith: The Hero
52
MFP '23-24   •   December 2021
It’s every kid’s dream to be a superhero, which is why I spend all my time wandering ar…
Staring Contest
1
ghost   •   June 2020
Today is the big day I prove to everyone down by the pond that I’m tough enough to be here, a…
Biome
OTLB '13   •   July 2021
Life ‘em up, boys. That’s what our sergeant used to say. Our job was to create the bigg…
Swingers
26
EAT '24   •   December 2023
Growing up in the 70’s was crazy…Bell-bottoms, Reagan was an actor… The thing t…
Male Introspection
124
AMC '23   •  
The Art of The Password, by Shar
20
PKS '21-'22   •   May 2023
If you make your password a real word make it assword because that’ll make your hacker laugh.…
Birthday Card
20
RIP '09   •   October 2008
GRANDFATHER: Here’s a card from me. Happy birthday. SON: Thanks, grandpa. MOTHER: Read it a…