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Pieces

Lobotomy
97
GPCP '22   •   January 2022
I sit down at the lunch table with a pruning saw and a smile. “Well, boys, I finally did it. …
Answering Machine
10
GPL '21-'22   •   October 2020
– (pickup) Hello? – Doc?! Is that you? It’s Billy.  – The Doctor is …
New Cat
BWM '19-'21   •   December 2020
So a couple days ago my wife and I decided to restart the old marriage. Seeing as I’m impoten…
Larry Buys Condoms
20
BWM '19-'21   •   March 2020
Larry: Hey, can I get some rubbers.  Clerk: Yeah, sure, what kind of johnny you looking for, …
Stars
13
NGH '23   •   June 2021
-Wow, you’re right, stargazing is pretty cool. -Stare long enough, and apparently you start …
Wheel of Fortune
31
MFP '23-24   •   December 2022
Contestant #1: I’d like to solve the puzzle: Host: Go right ahead. _’D   L_KE &n…
Incentives
53
MRB '25   •   December 2023
Ever since I earned my online economics nanodegree, I’ve been controlling my fourth-grade cla…
Kermit
75
MAS '18   •   December 2020
Hey Everyone i just wanted to send out a house-wide email to alert you of a Special problem that ha…
Good Cop, Bad Cop, Jelly-Donut Cop
43
JTB '20-22   •   December 2020
Bad Cop: We have your fingerprints on the gun, the doorknob, and the victim, punk. Good Cop: Hey j…
Mime Hero
41
EB '24   •   May 2023
Lawyer: Hey sir, I know you’re on the clock, but you really need to talk right now. A flower?…
President Nice Guy
30
HFJ '18   •   December 2020
Richard Holton, our first Nice Guy president, eased out of the womb on December 24, 1921, giving do…
Day in the Life Comix
30
IKI '26   •   May 2023
The Dust Bowl
LGF '21-'22   •   December 2020
Football is not what it used to be. During my golden years, AKA the Great Depression, we were all i…
My Relationship
8
ZPH '12   •   February 2010
… is like any other, especially the kind where one partner steals from the other, day after …
Brinkmanship
36
CLC '22-'23   •   May 2022
“The ability to get to the verge without getting into the war is the necessary art” &nd…
SchopenMeower Cartoons
24
AMC '23   •   May 2022
Girlfriend
40
GPCP '22   •   September 2021
Of course I have a girlfriend, she just goes to another school. Which school? The, uh, the one a fe…
Science Class
171
NGH '23   •   December 2022
Tommy: Aggghhh! It burns! It burns! (pulls safety shower lever)  Mr. Miller: Tommy, this can&…
Dear Historians,
SWR '19-'20   •   March 2020
At the time of writing, the COVID-19 pandemic has brought the world to a standstill. Though the Lam…
Charlie and the Next Successor
11
JGS '20   •   November 2019
It was time for old Charlie to pick the next child to take over the chocolate factory just as Willy…