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Symphonia Fantastica #


Issue Editor:
Art Editor: JFAR ’19-’22
Publication: September 2019

Finally, my very own eschew!
Aw crap, I mean ischew*!
Issue**! Dammit!!!


Pieces

...
Paul McCartney Hyping Himself Up Outside of Ricky’s Pub Before Naming The Beatles – July 14, 1958, Liverpool
21
August 2019
Okay Paul. You’ve got this mate. You’re gonna go in there, you’re gonna march rig…
...
A Day in the Life of Hamish Olsen, New York, 19
45
December 2020
She looked at him like a deer in headlights might look at someone if it had human eyes. Hamish had …
...
Kindergarten
3
October 2020
Hello, is this the mother of Steve Austin? The stone cold professional wrestler? The 54 year old ma…
...
Amnesia
1
October 2019
– John? I mean uh, excuse me random stranger? – What do you want? – I have amne…
...
Tech Support Chat
October 2020
– Hey is this the–uh–the Niteflirt phone sex line? – No, sorry, this is th…
...
The Big Prank
23
August 2019
Justin wants nothing more than to be friends with his next-door-neighbor Nate. They’ve been w…
...
The Number 6
12
October 2020
Arthur Peddleton is unable to comprehend the number 6. It began as a normal day for Arthur Peddlet…
...
Family
1
October 2020
I’ve got a crazy family — two brothers, four sisters, three half-brothers, one quarter-…
...
Dear President
19
October 2019
Dear President, My name is Bradley and I am 8. I’m from Ohio and my mom won’t let me p…
...
Mr. Worldwide
26
December 2020
Pitbull’s plane touches down at Miami International Airport at 12:43 on a Tuesday. He’s…
...
Whale Watching
11
October 2020
Guide: And here we have a FULL ORCA BREACH FOLKS A FULL BREACH! 9 O’CLOCK!!! Crowd: Wow! Ga…
...
Life After the Lampoon
18
August 2019
Conan O’Brien: Juan, congrats on graduating! Here, take this. Me: Wow, another Ferrari! Con…
...
The History of Hats
3
October 2020
There are all types of hats, like silver or classic. But hats haven’t always dominated our co…
...
Tom and Jerry Spec Script
3
October 2020
Tom is strolling along the railroad tracks, whistling a happy tune. Jerry walks parallel to Tom on …
...
My First Kiss
20
September 2020
I pick up this girl Julia in my car, and I’m doing 90 on Lincoln Avenue, you know, batting ma…