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Pieces
Pool Rules
126
SEH '26 • December 2023
Children under the age of 14 may not use the pool without a parent or guardian present, unless th…
My Birth
8
SWR '19-'20 • December 2020
Here are some things that might happen when I am born. — The doctor accidentally gives my pa…
Wet Dream
126
MAG '21-'22 • January 2022
At a sleepover. Kyle: Whoa! Brian what is that on your shorts?Brian: Uh, nothing! Kyle: Hey…
Lobotomy
97
GPCP '22 • January 2022
I sit down at the lunch table with a pruning saw and a smile. “Well, boys, I finally did it. …
One Liners
92
NGH '23 •
Advice For A New CIA Agent
15
HHD • October 2008
Welcome to your first day in the CIA. First of all, congratulations. If you’re an agent, you …
Half Day
11
MAG '21-'22 • March 2019
Good afternoon, parents. Principal Mueller here calling to inform you that your student has been re…
My Diwali
4
SAB '24 •
Diwali is a festival of lights that occurs in either October or November and is one of the major fe…
Hogtown
44
CYL '26 • December 2023
Most people move to Hogtown for the good public schools. They either come for that or Larry t…
Larry was there.
BWM '19-'21 • October 2020
Larry was there. Larry saw the flashes as the troposphere lit on fire, the sounds the bombs made as…
Waterboy
90
NGH '23 • January 2022
It’s my first day as waterboy. The rest of staff is nowhere to be found, so I guess I gotta…
Dialogue Options in Fallout: New Cambridge
91
JTK '24 • May 2022
Stranger: Hey there traveler! Is there anything I can help you with? [1] I’m very hu…
Lou Bega Gets Married
8
PKS '21-'22 • July 2019
A little bit of Jenieva in my life A little bit of Jenieva by my side A little bit of Jenieva is …
Application
83
EBC '22-'23 • October 2020
Hey Angel- Thanks for letting me read your college essay! I’ve left a few comments below. L…
The Woods
72
JLN '21-22 • November 2019
I bring you out here at the end of summer every year. You notice that? My father did the same. My f…
Party
49
JKF FOD • May 2023
Student: Don, man, what’re you doing at our epic party? Don Quijote: Ah, you see, I wa…
Movie Theatre
14
SWR '19-'20 • March 2019
Lampy Goes to Bartaco
63
The Harvard Lampoon • October 2022
What is the only thing Harvard students like more than telling people they went to school “ri…
Chronological Excerpts from the Rochester Cult Massacre Reports
64
SMR '25 • September 2022
Rick, 40 I’d better contribute something before anyone gets suspicious. “Let’s s…
Femme Fatale
16
VIN '21-'22 • October 2020
She walks into the room and grabs my attention. Or maybe she grabs my hand. I’m shaking now. …
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