Sign in Subscribe
About Comp Masthead Contact Search
Home About Comp Masthead Contact Sign in Subscribe

Pieces

Draft Dodging
60
RYSL   •   May 2023
The national draft is underway, and as an amputee I’m terrified of active combat. Thankfully,…
r/women Comix
37
AMC '23   •   March 2023
Lolita
102
NGH '23   •   December 2022
Lolita, light of my life, I feel fire in my loins. I lit my underwear on fire for you, Lolita. No o…
Choose Your Own Adventure
40
JGB '25   •   May 2022
You are feeling awfully hungry today. What would you like to eat? > A ham sandwich. Keep readi…
Dialogue Piece
44
MFP '23-24   •   March 2023
—  How was your weekend? —  I can’t tell you about things I did …
Side Gig
69
JTK '24   •   May 2023
Every pizza shop’s dream is a delivery driver with no obligation to the law. That, or an Ital…
Lampy Goes to Bartaco
63
The Harvard Lampoon   •   October 2022
What is the only thing Harvard students like more than telling people they went to school “ri…
Store Closing
DRM '18   •   December 2020
To Our Valued Customers, I regret to inform you that here at Frank’s Drugstore and Candy Emp…
Brain Man
42
JKF '25   •   March 2023
Knock knock. Hey silly. It’s me. The deceased 50 year old man who has permanently mov…
Prisoner’s Dilemma
60
EBC '22-'23   •   November 2019
Sitting handcuffed in the interrogation room, I started to sweat. They had the room at a cool 65, b…
My PG Movie
21
PKS '21-'22   •   May 2023
‘PG’ stands for ‘Parental Guidance.’ I know all about this because I am an …
May December Romance
103
EB '24   •  
- Yeah, I had a grandpa too once. Is yours cool or like a piece of shit or do you like hate him or …
Gavels
35
JGB '25   •   May 2023
You know that feeling when you take out your laundry and there’s only one sock, and you&rsquo…
Package Delivery FAQ
27
JGB '25   •  
Q: I had issues receiving the correct product. What should I do? A: Name which of the following sc…
Larry Purchases a Masturbation Bot
Anonymous   •   March 2020
Larry: Power on Masturbation Bot 3000: (turns on, starts fingering self)  Larry: Jesus&helli…
Dropping My D-Hall Tray
11
MMM '20   •   October 2020
No, dude. No no no no this is not happening right now. I’ve lightly grazed the doorframe on m…
Rhombus
326
JGB '25   •   May 2023
I have the rare version of the Midas Touch where everything I touch turns into rhombuses. It all st…
Elvis Has Left the Building
63
Robert Carlock '95   •   November 2020
ANNOUNCER: “Elvis has left the building!” TEENAGE FANS: “(Scream)!” ANNOU…
Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me
27
BWM '19-'21   •   September 2020
Peter Sagal: Thaaaanks Bill, it’s the week between Christmas and new years and we here at Wai…
TV Show Taglines
31
ZDG '20   •   October 2019
-Babies vs. Cars: Will the underdog keep losing? -A car? Versus a baby? -This baby specifically d…