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Pieces
Larry Purchases a Masturbation Bot
Anonymous • March 2020
Larry: Power on Masturbation Bot 3000: (turns on, starts fingering self) Larry: Jesus&helli…
Run To End Lung Cancer
69
JLN '21-22 •
Me: The runners, they’re all...? Ref: All terminally ill lung-cancer patients. Me: Oh…
Whale Watching
11
HJH '19 • October 2020
Guide: And here we have a FULL ORCA BREACH FOLKS A FULL BREACH! 9 O’CLOCK!!! Crowd: Wow! Ga…
Horse Girl Blog
73
LKN '25 • September 2022
06/07/2022 Hey saddle sisters. Didn’t play outside with the other kids today. Too busy doing …
2019 World Expo
14
SWR '19-'20 • March 2019
– Attention please, the presentation by Tajikistan will begin in 5 minutes. – (20 minu…
Squirrels
71
RYSL •
My ideal hangover cure is a lazy afternoon at the park, sipping on a cold beer and talking with the…
Advice
4
NSG '20-'22 • January 2020
Listen bro I totally get where you’re coming from, but just remember that next time you point…
Driving to a Burger Joint
CAS '12 • October 2018
“You gonna bring the shit tonight or what?” Simon was riding shotgun in Bill Shi…
The Time I Got Caught Milking
22
YMC '21-'22 • February 2020
One time I was at the farm, milking some cows when Bobby, the guy that owns the farm, comes out run…
Disenchantment Day
48
CYL '26 • May 2023
Disenchantment Day is my favorite day of the year. I live to shatter the false sense of secur…
The Trial of the Decade
17
MMM '20 • October 2020
Frankly, it seemed certain that Marco would get lunch detention. Frank Lee, our principal, along wi…
Amnesia
1
GPL '21-'22 • October 2019
– John? I mean uh, excuse me random stranger? – What do you want? – I have amne…
New Best Friend
361
SEH '26 • May 2023
This guy Brian showed up in my shower last night. The water wasn’t on, he was just read…
Genesis
10
HJH '19 • December 2020
In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, but …
Waterboy
90
NGH '23 • January 2022
It’s my first day as waterboy. The rest of staff is nowhere to be found, so I guess I gotta…
College
11
HJH '19 • October 2020
Kid: Well, I guess this is it, huh? Mom: Our baby boy, going to college. You know I remember when …
The Death of Kenzo Simmons
10
BWM '19-'21 • May 2021
-Welcome to heaven. Please state your name, occupation, and cause of death. -Wow, so you mus…
Morning Routine
15
HJH '19 • December 2020
8:00am – Wake up and shower. This is easy if you sleep in the shower. 11:30am – Put so…
Toss Me Off The Edge, Then, Why Don’t You?
ZDG '20 • August 2020
Oh, sure. Back me up further to the edge of the boat. I don’t mind. Are you pissed? You seem …
The Woods
72
JLN '21-22 • November 2019
I bring you out here at the end of summer every year. You notice that? My father did the same. My f…
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