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Pieces

The Number 6
12
HJH '19   •   October 2020
Arthur Peddleton is unable to comprehend the number 6. It began as a normal day for Arthur Peddlet…
The Talk Throughout History
41
MAV '23-'24   •   November 2020
Eve: I think that’s the wrong hole.Adam: Again?? I really wish we had parents to sit us down …
Business Presentation
11
CDL '21   •   June 2018
ME: And by subverting double axial capital inflows we can mobilize revenue twice as fast. SMITH: I…
Why I Wish I Was a Green Boy Instead of a Blue Boy
27
BWM '19-'21   •   December 2020
I was born a blue boy, but my whole life I’ve wanted to be a big green boy. Green boys get to…
Genesis
10
HJH '19   •   December 2020
In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, but …
Pervert Alert: My Friend Josh
67
FOD '24   •   December 2021
My friend Josh, hoo boy. That guy’s into some really fucked up stuff. Just look at him. Gre…
Escape Room
63
MFP '23-24   •   March 2023
— (To microphone in the corner of the room) Excuse me? We’re stumped. Could we get a hi…
Amnesia
1
GPL '21-'22   •   October 2019
– John? I mean uh, excuse me random stranger? – What do you want? – I have amne…
Love Song
MFP '23-24   •   November 2020
This next song goes out to Janet Fisher, a very special girl in my life. Janet are you here tonight…
Cheat Codes for Ace Attorney
126
LKN '25   •   May 2023
085888C8 60000000 Win every court case0452FDBC 10000000 Infinite evidence0452FDBC 0FFFFFFF Finite, …
Tech Support Chat
GPL '21-'22   •   October 2020
– Hey is this the–uh–the Niteflirt phone sex line? – No, sorry, this is th…
Texting on My Laptop
19
MAG '21-'22   •   February 2019
Me: Hey Sarah Me: Hey Me: Hey Sarah Me: Hey Sarah, sorry.  Me: I didn’t realize hitt…
If Money Grew On Trees
62
SAB '24   •  
- Environmental protection would be bipartisan. - In the fall, you could substitute real money wit…
Vanitas
LRK '21-'22   •   January 2021
Dear Readers,   My greatest hope for you all is that you actually know how to read because t…
A Quest
3
ASB '17   •   December 2020
I’m embarking on a quest to personally give a big thumbs-up to the child who made my iPhone. …
Laser Danger
30
MAG '21-'22   •   January 2022
Before dying of liver failure, action stuntman Laser Danger said some of the coolest things utter…
Frat Boy
55
NGH '23   •   December 2021
There’s nothing cooler than being a frat boy.  Picture this. I’m sitting on the f…
Mall Santa
18
JPW '21   •   October 2020
Beep. Beep. Beep. 5:15 AM. I sigh. I brew my morning coffee and catch up on the news — just …
Package Delivery FAQ
27
JGB '25   •  
Q: I had issues receiving the correct product. What should I do? A: Name which of the following sc…
New Cat
BWM '19-'21   •   December 2020
So a couple days ago my wife and I decided to restart the old marriage. Seeing as I’m impoten…