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Pieces

How I Stopped 9/11
211
RD '24   •  
I strut into the hideout, the most beautiful girl Osama bin Laden has ever seen.  Osama bin L…
Fire Department Tour
20
SWR '19-'20   •   March 2020
Fire Chief: And this here’s where we do our laundry—(alarm goes off) Oof, sorry kids, t…
If Money Grew On Trees
62
SAB '24   •  
- Environmental protection would be bipartisan. - In the fall, you could substitute real money wit…
The Life of a Cowboy
86
AJ '18   •   December 2020
I was only five years old when my grandpappy taught me how to shoot a gun. “Pull the trigger …
SchopenMeower Cartoons
24
AMC '23   •   May 2022
Office Crush
70
YMC '21-'22   •   December 2022
From the moment I met Louise Arlington, I knew the girl was trouble. "Sir?", she said. My god, that…
Fieldnotes
34
JKF '25   •   May 2023
In 1954, psychologists infiltrated housewife Dorothy Martin’s UFO doomsday cult.   …
Birthday Girl
14
RIP '09   •   October 2008
BIRTHDAY GIRL:  Tonight’s been unbelievable. You are honestly the most amazing friends…
Proposal
11
NSG '20-'22   •   December 2020
A successful relationship is about listening. That’s why, when my longtime girlfriend started…
Answering Machine
10
GPL '21-'22   •   October 2020
– (pickup) Hello? – Doc?! Is that you? It’s Billy.  – The Doctor is …
Video Game Pitch
23
JRD '22-'23   •  
Sit down gentlemen, I have our next hit game. You thought Sonic The Hedgehog made us rich? Well Son…
Mr. 305
34
FOD '24   •   September 2021
Ever had somebody tell you that you looked like a celebrity? For some it’s a blessing, but fo…
Side Gig
69
JTK '24   •   May 2023
Every pizza shop’s dream is a delivery driver with no obligation to the law. That, or an Ital…
Wet Dream
126
MAG '21-'22   •   January 2022
At a sleepover. Kyle: Whoa! Brian what is that on your shorts?Brian: Uh, nothing! Kyle: Hey…
Vanitas
10
AJ '18   •   December 2020
Now that you finally have this issue in your hands, you’re probably wondering one thing and o…
Yearbook Signing
10
MAG '21-'22   •   May 2021
-Hey Brad, want me to sign your yearbook? -Of course, Dylan! Good luck at Dartmouth next year. We&…
Advice
4
NSG '20-'22   •   January 2020
Listen bro I totally get where you’re coming from, but just remember that next time you point…
Allergy
52
LKN '25   •   March 2023
Molly: Oh Jon, this sunset picnic is so romantic…are you…crying? Jon: Sorry, *sniff*…
Guest Lecture by Joseph Campbell at University of Chicago, Transcript 11/24/68
33
JTB '20-22   •   December 2020
Good evening students. I’d like to begin by thanking those of you who showed up to this lectu…
2009 Make-A-Wish
51
JGB '25   •  
LeBron: Well, it’s been great having you here, bud! (smiles at TV cameras) Kid: Listen, LeBr…