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Pieces
New Partner
20
JFAR '19-'22 • January 2016
A cop’s #1 belief: I’m not gonna be the jerkoff that shoots his own partner. I live and…
The History of Hats
3
JPW '21 • October 2020
There are all types of hats, like silver or classic. But hats haven’t always dominated our co…
TV Salesman
13
ZDG '20 • October 2020
Bread the TV Salesman started the day like any other: with a hot cup of coffee and a curse to his m…
Girlfriend
40
GPCP '22 • September 2021
Of course I have a girlfriend, she just goes to another school. Which school? The, uh, the one a fe…
Party
49
JKF FOD • May 2023
Student: Don, man, what’re you doing at our epic party? Don Quijote: Ah, you see, I wa…
Dinner Date
6
BGS '22-'23 • November 2020
Lindsey: It is so hot that you speak French, Jack.Jack: Ah, but how else would I order . . . la cr&…
A Letter To The Suburbs
23
RYSL • December 2023
Dear Suburbs, You are my roots; I owe you everything. You molded me into the man that the city to…
Olympic Curling
6
MFP '23-24 •
Me: Hello, I’d like one ticket to watch the gold medal curling match, please. Cashier: I&rsq…
Springtime Getaway
23
OMA '24 • September 2021
Hello! Welcome to Go Chase Happiness And Dreams Travel Agency. Hi, my 8-months pregna…
Reddit History
10
MAG '21-'22 • June 2020
Comment on New Zelda Game Out! by /u/bowzrrr999 in /r/nintendo [–] GREG_THE_MAN 0 poin…
Gun Show
1
MAG '21-'22 • July 2021
Turbus: And this here is the Heckler and Koch SR9, with extra bolt-action to make your kills absolu…
Retirement Compound Salesman
28
MAV '23-'24 • November 2020
Apt. 1B: Hello there! How often have you dropped that Life Alert of yours into the toilet? At your …
Bad Days
21
MAG '21-'22 • October 2020
– When Dad broke out of jail and decided to hold his second family hostage instead of ours. …
Sleepy Sam
48
JRD '22-'23 •
Coming soon to a theater near you… (upbeat music playing) Sam Shmorganstein is a zookeeper w…
Video Game Pitch
23
JRD '22-'23 •
Sit down gentlemen, I have our next hit game. You thought Sonic The Hedgehog made us rich? Well Son…
Driving to a Burger Joint
CAS '12 • October 2018
“You gonna bring the shit tonight or what?” Simon was riding shotgun in Bill Shi…
Texting on My Laptop II
20
MAG '21-'22 • March 2019
You have entered the chat. You have added Sarah Brickman to the chat. Me: Sarah Me: !! Me: ****…
Larry Buys Condoms
20
BWM '19-'21 • March 2020
Larry: Hey, can I get some rubbers. Clerk: Yeah, sure, what kind of johnny you looking for, …
Staring Contest
1
ghost • June 2020
Today is the big day I prove to everyone down by the pond that I’m tough enough to be here, a…
Inventing the Wheel
8
MFP '23-24 • July 2021
Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce to you… the wheel! (Roaring applause) Just what exac…
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